One of my assistant managers pulled a real boner today....
He went into the bathroom, and somebody was taking a loud and smelly dump in there. Thinking it was me he yells "Damn would you be courteous and flush the toilet while you do that ?"
He comes out of the bathroom and notices me still working :))
It wasn't me after all :))
My reaction to this is to quote Howard Dean himself....
AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGHHHH !!!!
Over at Asherah's blog she posted about some piggish neighbors..... now I will do the same- but about family members..... the following is rated R for language content.........
I have a former aunt. I say former because I do not claim to be related to her (that is a story I will bitch about another day).
She is a college graduate. A school teacher. She makes a fair amount of money.
But- she is a freeloader and a pig.
She lived with my now deceased grandparents twice in the past ten years. She owns horses, etc, but has never had her own place that I know of.
Each time she moved out, she left huge piles of shit. The sane family members cleaned out the house. It was so bad that an uncle- who was once a minister- was so enraged that he said he wanted to "rip her fucking head off and shit down her neck."
Here are the ugly things they found:
Receipts, unopened bills, used toilet paper, used tampons that were turning moldy and green; green underwear- with shitstains on them. There was also filthy bedsheets.... and that was just part of it !
I have a brother who is somewhat piggish.... I never went into his home because I was worried I would catch something.
I have heard recently that some young military recruits have had to be trained in the basics of cleanliness and housework.
What in the hell is going on with people ?
Updated July 8th.
I am a 39 year old male, single parent of a teenage girl.
I currently live east of Reno, Nv. I am 5 foot 7, brown hair, hazel eyes, just recently got glasses:(
I weigh too much but I'm working on that.
I am a wanna-be journalist. It was my life long desire to become a broadcast journalist, but that didn't pan out.
The lesson from that is: Don't rely on a person's word - you will get screwed.
As a result, I work in the grocery industry.
I like photography,Football,astronomy,blogging, etc.
I have no tattoos, I don't drink or smoke, so my favorite drink is Coke.
I have no girlfriends, but applications are being accepted. Materialistic jerk-offs are not accepted. :P
I was born in Texas, lived in Colorado,Germany,Illinois,California, and Nevada.
During all that, I managed to see about 10 different countries and 25 states.
The most beautiful states I have been to are Colorado and Alaska.
When I die, I want to be buried with my bare butt sticking out of the ground, so everyone can kiss my ass.
I like email, but if you email me something stupid I will post your email address and let the spammers get it.
You've been told!
My email address is SPAMdesertSUCKSraspberryAToasisolDOTcom
Have you ever been mistaken for somebody else ?
Read on.... (beware- I am venting and use the "F" word five times!)
I am 5 foot 7, 275 lbs. I have brown hair, hazel eyes, no glasses. I have a soft voice, and generally people like me.
We have another person who does the same job I do- he is 5 foot 10, 350 lbs, dark crew cut hair, dark eyes and thick glasses. He is a loudmouth,annoying, phony, and tells people about his surgery where he lost a testicle.... fortunately I have not had to drop my pants to show these shitbuckets that I still have my nuts just to prove I am not him.
Now- how in the fuck this happens, I do not know- but people are constantly mistaking me for him, and I am getting fucking tired of it.
I have started going slightly psycho with customers who mistake me for him. I do not give a dog turd if it scares them off, but dammit, people need to get their fucking heads out of their fucking asses and look at the fucking world around them !
His name starts with a V- mine starts with an H- so the names are not even similar. We wear NAMETAGS but people are too lazy to look.
It happened again today- the man was talking about coming over and doing work at my house in Sliver Springs, Nv.
I don't live there- the man got insistant I did, and I asked him "Are you mistaking me for V--- ?"
He was- then I looked at him and asked "Do I wear glasses ? Do I have a crewcut ? Do I weigh 350 lbs ? Am I that annoying to you ? I would rather you insult my mother than mistake me for a jackass."
He was stammering and I gave him his receipt and went on to the next customer.
Stupid son of a bitch.
Out of nowhere, about 9:20 this morning, the sky grew dark and the wind began blowing.
Sand and dust began flying, I told a co-worker watch the lights go out- and it did- as soon as I said that-lol.
The lights went out at 9:23 and came on at 11:09.
Many roads are closed in this area of Western Nevada.
I may not do alot of blogging, as it is quite windy now and may lose power again.
Apparently scientists have developed a way to use human waste to generate electricity:
http://www.smh.com.au/articles/2004/04/26/1082831478217.html
I can just hear it now......
"Honey, did you just fart ?"
"No dear, I just turned the radio on."
They are talking about certain people being banned from using cell phones, like bus drivers, etc.
Why don't we just ban stupid people from breathing the same air that we do ?
http://www.washtimes.com/upi-breaking/20040425-041209-6435r.htm
A local man faces the judge after he breaks into a car parked at the office of Parole and Probation.
Good thing he's facing time in the crapper. This guy could get brains and become dangerous out in society.
http://www.lahontanvalleynews.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20040426/News/104260004
Canyon County Idaho has billed Mexico for illegal aliens on the dole. Sounds like an idea.
Read it here:
Did you know in Nevada:
It is illegal to drive a camel on the highway.
It's still "legal" to hang someone for shooting your dog on your property.
For this and other stupid crap go visit:
John Kerry says he doesn't have an SUV, but his family does. Go look for yourself.
Heh heh.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/worldlatest/story/0,1280,-4009850,00.html
This guy turned down a multi-million dollar contract with the Cardinals to join the Army Rangers, and now he has been killed in combat in Afghanistan :(
http://www.knxv.com/news/index.asp?did=9409
*UPDATE
In his honor, I am posting the link to the "Ranger Creed."
This kind of irritates me.
When I was picking up my perscription today the girl asked me:
"Have you ever 'tooken' this medicine before ?"
I wanted to ask her if she got her High School diploma out of a Cracker Jack box, but I didn't.
The procedure lasted about 3 hours.
They have tried numerous times to blast the stone with sound waves ( called lithoptripsy ) but it was not working.
What they did was insert a scope and laser into the only natural opening down there (and I don't mean the anus ) and hit it with a laser.
Needless to say- I am sore, and it hurts to pee :(
They seem to have blasted the stone this time, but half of the stone went into the "south pole" of the kidney.
Now I am being treated for gout..... I feel too young for this crap-lol.
Just a short note to say Hi :) I am a bit sore from my surgery.
I hope to do more blogging tomorrow :) I am under the influence of pain meds at the moment, so I wouldn't sound too intelligent-lol.
On a side note- out of curiousity, I put a search on google for my blog- and found it :)
I am not sure if that is any big deal- but I thought it was cool :)
Have a good night, will see you tomorrow.
What if a woman invites people to her bridal shower and they don't go ?
Here are the details:
For about 11 months I dated a co-worker, and it was pretty serious. She broke it off in July by email (like a coward) and said I "can no longer spoil her, and somebody else wants to."
Ok- I am glad she broke it off then....materialistic turd >:(
She is getting married next month, and invited several people to her bridal shower.
They have told me they will not attend because she was "such a bitch" to me.
I didn't expect that show of support, but I welcome it.
Her upcoming marriage shows one thing:
It shows there's a sucker born every minute, and I wasn't one of them. :)
Here is something for you to chew on.
I found this to be an interesting article. California Gov. Schwarzenegger is proposing that their legislature be part time.
Here in Nevada, our state legislature meets every 2 years for 120 days. I think they may need some more time, but still it's a good idea. We have a state senator who is a waitress, a few assemblymen who are Ranchers, cops, etc. I think maintaining the "common touch" is a good thing.
http://www.opinionjournal.com/diary/?id=110004974
There will be light blogging for the next few days- I am having some surgery for a kidney stone tomorrow.
I have lost count how many times I have had this done since last summer, so hopefully they will destroy this damn thing once and for all.
Why is it at night I can't get a Reno radio station 60 miles away, yet I can get stations in Denver, Salt Lake City, San Fransisco, Los Angeles, and Albuquerque ?
I can't get over how cold it gets in the desert. It's about 35 degrees and raining right now.
In a few months I will complain about the heat-lol.
Having worked in a grocery store for a long time I have come to the conclusion that men should not shop there.
I know that sounds funny coming from me-lol.
About 10 years ago a Navy dude came in and got his stuff- paid for it and left.
Thirty minutes later he returned and said "You didn't take my coupons off."
I said "You didn't give me any coupons."
His reply was "Oh- was I supposed to give them to you ?"
(And these are the people we send to war?!)
Another instance- I was on the express lane, and some smart ass said "I sure wish you would open up the express lane."
I said "You are on the express lane...." and then I pointed up at the BIG express lane sign and said "....there's your sign!"
I should have offered him some smart pills, but he would probably have stuck them in his butt.
I can't seem to find the story on the net, but I heard this on the radio. This is definitely news from the shallow end of the gene pool.
Some moron in Fontana, California was shooting from a moving car, and he ended up killing his own getaway driver.
Fontana police were quoted as saying the shooter "is the stupidest person we have ever dealt with."
No shit, sherlock !
Good !
Welcome to my corner of the blogging world :)
Things might look disjointed right now, but hopefully I can figure it out.
I want to thank Jane at http://www.burnt-fuse.com/weblog/
and Andrew at
http://ambientirony.mu.nu/
for helping me get started on this.
Will be back later on- :)
dr